Distractions and what I ought to be doing

Dear Diary,

I have done a lot of soul searching recently. In my dreams I'm out there, with old friends, on some kind of flight, crashing through trees, keeping books, maintaining friendships, looking ahead despite all life's little ups and downs. Right now I find myself embroiled with the luthier. I know, in my heart of hearts that this is not the right direction to be headed. It's a backwards step. I should be working, studying, doing the best I can. Yet there is an inner child inside of me (most probably affected by my sun sign - Gemini - even if the Ascendant [in my case ruled by the leaden and grave planet Saturn] is, in truth, more important, according to the wisdom of the ancients) which wishes to break free from the bondage of indentured servitude, Captain Bligh and all of his b-s--t.

I was given a new lease of life today: the possibility of a gig, a private party with our new band. I love doing things like that. It's a social event, not without its own issues (those of the luthier) but in truth, I will be in my element: a musician on stage, shining as brightly as the pole star. I'll be in my element. Never mind Captain Bligh, or the most boring Stalin, or any of my other responsibilities (except for those towards little Ronulus, my Cambridge Terrier, who will always come first). I must think about what is important. Sure, editing for the old ball and chain (yes yes yes, that goes without saying). Then there is the 'pillar post' I am working on, which is pretty cool. It's still a long way off yet, but I'm working on it diligently. I actually love it, even if it's not ideal (i.e. a proper tenure at a university somewhere, but this is Dark Age Britain, not the 8th century Tang Dynasty in China, or the Umayyad Caliphate in 11th century Baghdad, nor even 1463 in Florence, Renaissance Italy. These are the Dark Ages, here, now, in Britain - this is not the place or time for scholars, poets and musicians. It is a place for beggars, slaves or crooks, and nothing in between).

In any case, I shall be making a trip down to my old home town, to pick up a painting (the cover for my play Boadicea: Queen of the Iceni). During that time I will meet old friends, which will surely be nice. The sound of the violin, particularly, is one I am extremely fond of.

Right now I should be editing for the old ball and chain. I'll get it done, before the deadline, yes yes yes yes. Of course. But besides that, I fondly research this little paper.

Max.