I find myself perpetually distracted, still, pre-occupied with the onerous responsibility of late fatherhood. I can't think straight unless I force myself to. The thoughts which occupy my mind, are what are we going to do if and when she comes to visit. Firstly, apologise profusely for not being there, and once we've got past that (or even before), make her feel welcome. What would a 20 year old French lady do with a 43 year old father that hasn't seen her since ever? I very much doubt she would be interested in discussing classical texts, or exploring the nuances of various philosophies or the finer points of comparative religion (or maybe should would, who knows?)
It's not like being with any other woman I've been with, sitting down watching a movie, ordering out, or maybe it will be, I don't know. I thought perhaps seeing where her father grew up might be a good idea, meeting the family (I am quite sure mother would be interested to meet her). There are also some quite nice places to see around the immediate area, Oxford, Bath, Stonehenge, which may be of interest.
I guess it's best just to play it by ear and wait and see what she would like to do. She may just want to sit down and talk and get to know her old man, which would be great. One thing I must not do, is be anything like my father, completely overbearing and dictatorial. Hospitality means being made to feel welcome, not being made to feel like a little child. It will be difficult to match the French lifestyle, in terms of fine cuisine or even fine wine, but I know a few places which she might be interested in going. There is only little place I know which serves excellent food and has an great atmosphere. I also happen to know the finest vintages available (red or white, some rosé even).
My uncle Humphrey is a real hoot, so one would think that he would be more of a suitable role model. He's always good fun to be around, parties a lot, goes clubbing, does the Manx TT every year and runs a drunken marathon (when you have to stop at every pub on the route and have a drink). Yet that would be too much. I should be an inspiration, drawing on the best aspects of Humphrey's friendliness, without crossing the line, always being respectful, listening, answering any questions she may have, and being a fount of knowledge without coming across as arrogant (for I may know a thing or two, but I know comparatively little compared to what there is to know).
There is also the question of moving forward with my own life without being overly concerned about her's. I think it is best if I just leave the ball in her court, for the moment, and see what happens. I have to finish that assignment for the old ball and chain, and I have a lot of reading to do in preparation for my law degree. I was reading an Oxford University Press book on Criminology today, which is quite interesting (and, I would say, essential reading for any would-be attorney, barrister or judge). It's not the minutiae of statutes and torts, nor even the historical contextualisation of constitutional law, but is more based on biology, genetics and psychology (with a fair bit of social science and politics thrown in there) all framed in the context of crime and punishment, the law. It's quite fascinating, actually. One should imagine that without such knowledge (and knowledge like this) it would be rather difficult to understand the processes behind why people are anti-social or commit crimes. There are some theories I disagree with, and fortunately, like most scientific (and even classical studies) papers, not enough is yet known about certain aspects of the relationship between genetics and criminology. Therefore, things like free will cannot be ruled out. In my experience, it is not necessarily the 5,000 or so 'criminal' genes, or hormones, or testosterone that makes criminals commit crimes (though they may be factors) or even the environment or peer pressure, but it is more to do with volition. A person wants to commit a crime in many (but not all) cases because they want something, be it materialistic property, revenge or thrill seeking (or indeed any other number of negative motivations). Pre-meditation and having a conscience (or not) are also important factors. I do not believe that criminals commit crimes because it is in their genes, or their stress levels made them do it, I believe that many crimes are committed either on a whim, to show off, or mostly through avarice or unsavoury motives in more sinister crimes. In any case, it's food for thought.
I should be reading statutes, torts and amendments, really. These are like the primary sources of classical studies, the nuts and bolts, a bit like reading past trials and their outcome. All this theory and contextualisation is important, but only as important as secondary sources are in classical studies: they are hearsay, not evidence.
Max.
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